Why

This is a business blog. I know. Stay on message. Know the boundaries.

Alas, I cannot help myself. What happened in Connecticut this past Friday is so sacred that I fear I defile the angels just by mention. At services this weekend, I noted how our priest struggled with the issue, sighing that he spent most of his time in the chapel taking visitors who wanted to know “Why”. It was expected that he could “explain.”

Deliberately, I have kept my distance these past two days out of abject emotional fear. If I ask “Why” then I have to enter that room. And when I enter that room, all that I am and all that I encompass goes with me. All that I encompass includes my family, my friends, my living network. Suddenly, I am the parent, the grandparent, the uncle, the friend, the coach, the casual observer of those slaughtered.

I deal in math and numbers. Math is mostly about order, about explanation. I build models to explain the world of economics and finance to my clients. I cannot explain this. All I can do is pray to my God for the comfort and peace of all those touched by this horrific tragedy. I will hold them in my heart. I will hug my wife, my kids, my grandkids and all others who need it. We all need it.

I am sorry.

Bob Bilkie, CFA